Gaming and journaling has become an asset in my routines of thriving forward, reflecting, analyzing and finding meaning.

Something I came across in my quest for a deeper understanding and confrontation of my system and the self effective way I can find meaningfulness in this life and system is a very interesting concept for a roleplaying game.

Mörk Borg.

It’s a Swedish RPG that enables solo play with journaling. What I find intriguing in this game are the following aspects:

1. It is absolutely light rules. There is no need for overcomplicated character building or poring over the rules. It is a pretty deadly system, but this is pretty welcome, considering the world it plays in:
2. World building: It’s a pretty grim and malicious world. The setting is, in short, a world on the brink of the apocalypse, and by that I mean a proper “End of The World Scenario”.
3. Consequently, the game is ultra dark, full of anarchy and death.
4. The artwork and the gameplay are absolutely nihilistic, it serves my passion for Punkrock and Doom Metal.
5. The world is pretty indifferent about what happens to the character.

Well, why is that interesting? Now, if you look into the earlier posts you will recognize that a large part of my quest for self efficacy and meaningfulness is based on the bleak visions of Thomas Ligotti and H.P. Lovecraft. Finding meaning and self efficacy in worlds where insignificance and nihilism seems to be pretty contradictory or paradox. But in the end, by delving into this existential dilemma, I find a lot to live for and to find meaning, because of the stark contrast. There is a lot of emotional triggering involved and that is something that keeps my emotional system in movement. Especially when it comes to moments of nearing the void of depression or anxiety, this is a great way to shake myself up and make myself (pretty playfully) get into contact with deeper and more unsettling parts of my psyche.

And it’s a lot of fun, too.

Until next time, keep up the faith in yourself and take one step at a time.