The Clear Horizon

From oblivion of alcoholism into the light of sobriety

  • Another word on nostalgia – why old patterns and habits in a renewed appearance is a real support

    Indulging in music of my adolescence and my early grown up years still serves a very important function. And actually Cosmic Horror, Science Fiction, RPG and all that stuff serves the same function. Why is that so? Fundamentally, the “mobile imagery” comes back into play (cf. “My life is like a Mobile“): Every choice to… Read more

  • How the death of my uncle offers a quantum of solace

    This is a pretty personal note on an incident that just happened recently: My uncle died, and although he wasn’t that close to me and my grief has its frontiers, it has a couple of implications about my own finiteness of life. First of all, I am in a current state of reevaluating and restructuring… Read more

  • Is AI making us deliberately stupid? A Word on digital dementia

    I don’t know what it particularly is, maybe a drive towards high level activating activities to boost dopamine release, but I love to dive into controversial discussions. There have been a lot of things passing through my system during times of teaching and working as a social worker, at the same time when I was… Read more

  • The Clear Horizon vs Cthulhu

    This is the project in which I want to incorporate dealing with Neurodiversity, Sobriety and Self Efficacy and short stories related to Cosmic Horror. It’s a project that is evolving and I am curious as how to this is going to unfold. Mind that it may be progressing or degressing deliberately, depending on how my… Read more

  • Defeating self expectations, or self defeating expectations?

    Here we go again. Seeing the logo of my podcast host service alone pushes up stress levels. Why is that so? Well, it’s all about motivation and in turn over exaggerated expectations generated by it. The problem arising is a recurring pattern in ADHD, enough to make a Cosmic Horror short story out of (and… Read more

  • mechanics of Journaling RPG and the subconscious processing of my alcoholism

    Yes, it’s cosmic horror again. I am just about to finish my first three short stories, and one is, I think, one of the more obvious processing of alcoholism. As I said, I use Cosmic Horror as a vehicle to tap into subconscious processes of my addiction, and in the case of the upcoming short… Read more

  • When is must can, and can must?

    Ok, we have basically four modes: WTF? Ok. Here goes: So, when is something must-can and when is it can-must in my case? A “must” becomes a “can”, or must-can, if I find a way to reframe the initial urgency or obligation into something that is becoming intriguing and appealing enough to get me into… Read more

  • Giving meaning to the eternal Horror that is called the cycle of life

    Have you ever watched the film Vivarium? No? Well, I would say it’s one of the most unsettling films I’ve ever seen. Here’s why and why it’s important for my voyage. It’s not a Lovecraftian film in the strict sense. But it has a lot of the implications of the insignificance of humans in the… Read more

  • A first attempt at cosmic horror sketching

    Why? Read the according Blog Post „Art therapy…“ The question that may arise is: why the rat thing Brown Jenkin? (From „Dreams in a Witch House“ by H.P. Lovecraft). I guess it is because it‘s one of my favorite Stories and this character is so purely evil and devastating in its own right, a perversion… Read more

  • A cul de sac – What now?

    Keeping up the energy to get going is pretty stressful. I am now beginning to realize that it’s not simply about building up too many good habits and trying to do too many “good things” at once. I have a more fundamental problem right now, and that is something I dreaded in a long time:… Read more