The Clear Horizon

From oblivion of alcoholism into the light of sobriety

life

  • Am I boring or am I bored

    I guess in earlier periods in my life, I would have answered the question as follows: As long as I stick to expectations of my peers, family and co-workers, I am likely not to be boring, even though I might be bored. A classic situation would be going to a club or a disco, where Read more

  • My midlife crisis – Or is It…?

    When my mid – 40s hit, I had the feeling something went horribly wrong in my life. I hated my job, approached my third burnout and I had the feeling I had taken the wrong turn somewhere in my life, although I have always told myself and everybody I wasn’t into a materialistic lifestyle. Interestingly, Read more

  • Toxic positivity in consumerism vs real life improvement

    I recently listened to commercials on the radio, and it suggested to “live your dreams” and “be individualistic” and “free your mind”, “be yourself”. It sounded like some sort of lifestyle coaching tips, but in the end it was only an advertisement for a car, an SUV, that superficially suggests an independent lifestyle, outdoors, with Read more

  • Insights true today maybe obsolete tomorrow – how I accept new beliefs without the urge of justifying

    When I quit drinking, I had the conviction that I could go on with my habits like before, only by shifting from alcoholic beverages to non alcoholic beverages, but the amount and the habits stayed the same. I thought that this would keep me from becoming boring in the eyes of other people. Plus, there Read more

  • How to deal with people you don’t want in your sober life anymore – and vice versa.

    There were those days I thought I needed to be friendly, to be everybody’s darling, to please everybody. Yes, there were times when I thought I needed to make a large circle of “friends” on social media. Boy, the times have changed. I always thought it was due to Covid that I had reduced social Read more

  • Should we cry more?

    That may seem like an odd questions for a male to take into consideration: Crying is something for kids and for girls – or so… At least that’s how the truisms or our deeply rooted beliefs tell us. And, yes, these beliefs are deeply, deeply implanted not only in our individual systems, but also the Read more

  • Why all the Disorder Talk – FindIng my Core

    Why am I focusing so much on anxiety, a possible ADHD or depression although this is about quitting and recovery? Exactly because of that. The more I deep dive into my own recovery and the more the Pink Cloud fades (something I will surely post upon later), the more I get to discover more and Read more

  • How parents influence your alcoholism – habits, belief, mindset, Education

    I am no Freudian psychoanalyst and I am not a therapist, as I said before. But I think I can identify strong relations between my drinking habits and the way of my socialization in my family. That is of course nothing new, but this insight came so strongly to me after meeting my parents after Read more

  • Externalising, “I” – Statements and booze – How “manly” habits contributed to my psychic disorders

    “If that stupid colleague hadn’t squealed to the boss, things wouldn’t have just worked out fine and the job would have still been there”, he said, then taking a large draft from his beer. What does this short message (which is made up), tell us? What is so wrong with these forms of dealing with Read more

  • Social Media and alcohol

    Sometimes ideas or conclusions or insights strike like lightning or appear a long time afterwards. I want to share one I had today about my own relationship with social media and alcohol consumption. I don’t mean an abusive way of consuming social media after quitting drinking, in which I compensated for my alcohol consumption with Read more