The Clear Horizon

From oblivion of alcoholism into the light of sobriety

addiction

  • Anxiety, ADHD, alcohol, the prefrontal cortex, learning and the lizard Mode

    Are you familiar with the lizard mode? It is a concept introduced by one of my anti-aggression-coaches. No, not because I was aggressive, but it was a seminar about how to deal with aggressive behavior in youths. It is basically saying that once you are emotionally activated in such a way that all your rationale… Read more

  • mechanics of Journaling RPG and the subconscious processing of my alcoholism

    Yes, it’s cosmic horror again. I am just about to finish my first three short stories, and one is, I think, one of the more obvious processing of alcoholism. As I said, I use Cosmic Horror as a vehicle to tap into subconscious processes of my addiction, and in the case of the upcoming short… Read more

  • My recovery is political after all…

    I try to be as little politcal as possible in this blog, yes. I will not blame political right or left, nor do I want to nameshame certain politicians or spread political views. But I would like to comment on certain developments, political and societal, which really tick me off in terms of having turned… Read more

  • extreme choices, extreme emotions – how to cope without a single drop of rum?

    Sometimes it’s hard to determine (in terms of heartfelt instances) if living in extremes was there before alcohol or the other way around: When I quit drinking, my hope was, a bit, to leave the life of dichotomous choices or emotional spikes and dips, a life of black-and-white thinking, whatever you may want to call… Read more

  • Community; like minded people, same disorder, different core – exchange as best form of Therapy

    This may sound like a no-brainer, but in my opinion and my experience, it is not so easy finding THE right community. I have tried different approaches, but none has been so successful like my most recent attempt, which, actually, I was getting into couple of weeks ago, but only now I actually realized the… Read more

  • After half a year of cutting back and sobriety – Am I bulletproof yet?

    The longer I work on my sobriety, the more loose ends come up of which I sometimes have the feeling that it all is either too much to work on, or that it is too much I think I need to do to have a successful recovery. But is all that really necessary? A two… Read more

  • Being strict with sobriety but not with other addictive behaviour

    Something that has been on my mind for a while now is the question why it seems to be no bigger issue for me to deal with other habit loops and/or addictive behavior in a moderate and sensible way while with alcohol I can’t. I won’t get into too much detail for toxic habits and/or… Read more

  • Alcoholism is a spectrum. Here’s why.

    Yesterday I reflected on the question when an addiction is actually an addiction, and apart from the “objective” diagnosis you get from a doctor or therapist, it is mostly up to you to define and feel if you have an addiction. I was neither diagnosed nor had I a distinct conversation with people who told… Read more

  • Reward vs quick fix

    Will I never doom scroll again? Or have a beer? Or buy something stupid on Amazon? The answer is (in the correct order): Maybe, no, yes. Here’s why: Doom scrolling has nothing of worth to me in terms of a reward in terms of “Oh, I have had such a stressful day, I am going… Read more

  • The quick fix is not the problem – addiction is

    We all have this from time to time – indulging in little sins to please a craving. Be it chocolate, gaming, social media, buying something, a small treat – you name it. I think the problem is not pleasing a little craving once in a while. It’s a little dopamine spike that can sweeten your… Read more